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Are you a planner? I am. Give ya girl a spreadsheet, a plan, a stretch-goal, and highlighters+sticky notes (preferably in olive green) and I can spend all day dreaming, stretching, thinking, organizing, prioritizing. I love thinking about future goals and then planning out how to get there in day-to-day lists. Pre-pandemic, we were set with great jobs, a great house, great schools for the kids, a great neighborhood, and great friends. In a way, it felt like we had landed in a forever-type situation with our home and jobs. And, it was so nice to feel the stability and ease into what we thought life would look like until retirement.
Then 2020 happened. Then 2021. Then 2022. And, most of those ‘greats’ were lost in one way or another. We moved across country, uprooted our family from all of the above normalcy, changed jobs/careers. Whew. Today I just don’t want to talk about that part. Other days, maybe. But the loss is visceral today.
I think that’s because I saw a glimpse of a “new thing”. Today at church, my daughter sang ‘Holy, Holy, Holy’ while my husband sang harmony and played the guitar. I know I’m biased, but it was absolutely gorgeous with eerie harmonies that sounded like Sons and Daughters (if you know that group). After they finished, the whole sanctuary was quiet. It was holy and simple, weighty and light. At least that’s how it felt to me after the last few years of “what just happened?” in the Church and in my own church.
I want to say today was redemptive to see them singing again or hearing the hymn again or to us being in church still or to land in a new place. But I don’t want to use the word redemptive.
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