To the weary

When you feel like you have nothing left and what you have is not enough.

There are SO many of you who send messages or comments about just being tired. I think at this point in the pandemic, we all feel that way. But, today I want to write to those of you who have been loving your neighbor for 18 months by wearing a mask, staying home, getting vaccinated, distancing, and simply understanding what ‘love your neighbor’ means. Yes, it’s exhausting to have to continually make mental decisions of where we go, who we hang out with, if you should let your kid go to a birthday party…fill-in-the-blank for decision fatigue. But, I think it’s even more exhausting (and wearisome) to see others make decisions that are clearly not loving our neighbors (including churches). It’s exhausting and frustrating, isn’t it? You’re doing the right things while others aren’t. And, it’s coming at a cost.

So, friends, are you weary? Are you tired? Do you feel like you don’t have much left? Today is for you. For the pastors who have been making the love-your-neighbor decisions for 18 months (and their families). For the CNAs who check on a patient at 3 am and sing a song over them as they wrestle with sleep. For the mommas who worry about their child who works in a grocery store where the majority do not mask. For the fathers of high-risk family members who want desperately to protect them from COVID. Today is for you.

When you feel like you have nothing left and what you have is not enough.

Remember the story in the Bible about the woman who gave 2 coins (Mark 12)? She came in after rich people threw in a bunch of money in the offering plate. But, she came in and gave 2 coins - the Bible says they were only worth a little. Who did Jesus recognize though? Who did He talk about and make note of as an example to His disciples? With that “little”, with the coins “worth a little”, she was the one that Jesus took note of. Not the rich ones who threw in a bunch of money that didn’t cost as much as the widow’s coins.

She had little and not much worthy in the world’s eyes - But, to Jesus she had enough.

Remember the story in the Bible about the woman (Luke 8) with the bleeding issue that had spent all she had for years on trying to be healed (I think she spent monetary funds, yes, but also mental and emotional energy seeking this out)? She used all she had left - which was not much - as a simple reaching out to touch the hem of a garment with fingertips in a bold (and quiet, unseen act) to a man who she had heard might be able to help. What she thought was a quiet, unseen, incognito act became a moment where Jesus full stopped what he was doing. (Side note, I always LOVE this story because Jesus asked people, “who touched me?”. Y’all, if I were there like the disciples, I probably would have said, “uhm, lots of people Jesus. There’s a crowd here!”. This makes me chuckle every time.)

Ok, back to the story.

She had little left and was not noticed by anyone - Other than Jesus.

Do you resonate with these stories? Prior to 2020, many of us had a whole lot more to give. We had more mental energy, physical energy, emotional space. We were planners and things in their places, thank you very much. As Americans, we are used to controlling - and, planning is not bad - don’t get me wrong. There’s wisdom in planning and stewardship of our resources, time, energy, etc. But this pandemic season has been a long season of stripping away things we thought we could control.

And, replacing it with manna that has to be collected daily - not hoarded for weeks at a time. Daily recognition of the miracle like the dew that sustains, provides, nourished. Is enough.

I’m not making light of the incredibly hard times many of you are going through. This post is not me saying surface-level false hopes of “just pray about it” or “have faith” or “Jesus works all things for his good…” or other dumb, trite things we wrongly say to people who are hurting. What I am hoping to give is some hope that your enough today is enough. That’s where Romans 8 comes in for us - the Spirit intercedes for us when we don’t know what to pray - when we have groans that words can’t capture. His strength comes in when we are weak.

So, if you are at the end of your rope and feel like you don’t have as much anymore to give today -

Remember this -

Jesus notices the 2 coins you have left and the brief reaching out to the hem of his garment in the middle of a large crowd. Even if those coins feel like they are the last you have to give and that arm is outstretched, tired, weary. It’s enough. It touched the hem and was enough.

You are noticed. Jesus stops for you. He is there. He notices. He sees.

Be encouraged, friends. This won’t be forever. But, for today, His manna, His presence, His strength is enough for whatever you can bring. Even if you feel like it’s not much.

It’s enough. Because He is enough. I hope today you can find some rest in the weariness of the pandemic.

-FNE